A Get to Attitude

Photo by Bakd&Raw by Karolin Baitinger on Unsplash

One of the many benefits of owning my own business is that I have the flexibility to say yes to things that I wouldn't have been able to say yes to in the past. This morning, for example, I got to choose not to work so I could decorate cookies with my nephews. After a few hours, just before nap time, I put on my bright red coat and started putting on my shoes.

Why are you leaving? One of them asked.

I started to say because I have to work, but then I caught myself. I don't have to work; I want to work. I had no projects due, no clients to meet with, but things that I wanted to accomplish and that's why I was choosing to go back home. I was actually looking forward to the work and yet my default phrasing was to state it as an obligation.

It’s something we all do, right? Around the holidays especially, it’s very easy to turn every wonderful thing from a get to into a have to.

In life, there are very few things that we truly have to do. We have to drink water, eat food, sleep and breath. It is a blessing for me that my work feels like a get to because for most people it is a have to which supplies the food and water and shelter. All of those are things we have to do but no family obligation ever is. You have choices and if you are choosing to be with people then it’s because not being with them would be worse. Or perhaps it's because you are doing it for someone you love, like a partner, in which case you still get to do something that shows someone you support them. If that’s not the case, then why are you going?

If you are entering any situation this holiday season with a have to attitude, then you are setting yourself up for failure before you’ve even arrived. Instead, maybe focus on the reason you are choosing to go; when we focus on the positive, we are more likely to see more positive. Don’t stay because you have to, stay because you get to share your life with people that love you, and that’s no small thing.