The Impossible Box

On January 1, 2023 a good friend of mine and I poured some sparkling water and sat at her kitchen table brainstorming New Year’s resolutions. Once we had a list ready of our goals, we went to the store and bought a bunch of bottles of champagne. Most of the bottles were pretty cheap but they were a way of celebrating various achievements throughout the year. As we strolled through the champagne aisle, I decided to splurge; if I made it through the whole year and reached every goal, I would pop a bottle of Dom Pérignon…

As you embark on a New Year and think about the "new you" that you want to be, remember that goals aren't about changing who you are; goals are about finding who you are and that process begins on day one. When you set your eyes on a target, and start making a plan for how to reach it, you should be thinking about two things: rituals and habits.  

For those of you alive in the 1970s, you may remember the Ford Pinto. Debuted in 1970, this small car was cheap to buy and the first of its kind from the Ford Motor Company. It appeared to be successful by all reports until about 1972 when the deaths started piling up. Upon investigation it appeared that the car was prone to catching fire when hit from behind, even in low-speed crashes. What’s very disturbing is that this wasn’t something accidental that occurred; Ford failed numerous safety inspections and knew that the car was likely to catch fire.

As I write this, I am sitting in Bryant Park. The sun is peeking through the clouds, I'm in eye shot of the Empire State Building and arms reach of way too many pigeons. In a few minutes, I'll walk the half mile uptown to MoMA, the Museum of Modern Art. While I've lived outside New York most of my life, I have yet to visit the great museums the city has to offer. It's something I've always wanted to do, but could never seem to muster the motivation to make a plan. So what got me here today?  A few weeks ago…

Remember last week, when I wrote about writing at the Office? Well, I had such a great experience the first time, I decided to come back here again. When I arrived, I sat down and immediately found my flow. After two hours, with a huge smile on my face, I got up to take a quick break and use the bathroom. I came back not 3 minutes later and there was a gentleman standing very close to where my stuff was. He seemed to be just ordering a drink and I assumed maybe he would take it to another seat - after all, the entire bar was open. Unfortunately, I was wrong.

Finish your dinner or you don't get dessert… Clean your room and you'll get 30 more minutes of screen time… Be good in the store and we'll pick out a toy… If you have ever been around children for any extended period of time, you have probably said some version of those statements. While I do not have children myself, I have worked with kids of varying ages as a Children's Director for 6 years and have an additional 4 years under my belt as a middle school teacher. So I totally get it when you find yourself in a moment when you just want to punish or reward. I also totally get it if you read my post last week and were a little annoyed or defensive, so let me add a little more to the story…

In 2010, I was working as a Middle School Science teacher at a small school in Ecuador. Unlike my time at an American School, when teachers showed up early to prep and ready their classrooms, most Ecuadorian teachers arrived on the busses with the students. As a result, it became a common trend for all the teachers to be arriving with the students right at 8am, giving everyone just a few minutes to get situated before the first bell. The head of the school, an American, tried to change this habit by implementing a sign-in system. When we arrived at the school, we had to…

When I set out to drive the 348 miles from New Jersey to upstate New York, what I planned to do was only stop for gas. What I ended up doing was hike 3 mountains. That feels like quite a leap, but a few basic truths about behavior change can explain how I got there.

In his book Effortless, Greg McKeown discusses the idea that sometimes we focus too much on how we’re going to get through the hard parts of something, when instead we should be asking the question, how can I make the hard parts easier? A lot of difficult tasks are not enjoyable until you finish and have that satisfied feeling of completion. Unfortunately...

It was about mile 7. Or maybe it was 8, when I first saw him coming up next to me. He hung there for a while, matching my stride, then falling a little behind when I would get some bursts of energy. Then, nearing mile 10, when I started to hit the wall, he edged far enough in front of me that I could see the back of his shirt. It read: Iron Sharpens Iron.

47 Weeks. According to Instagram, that’s how long this project took. The picture you see above is from my newly renovated office. When I went to post the final pictures Saturday morning, I realized that it had been 47 weeks since it began. After seeing the final product…