How to Remember Everything Ever
A pumpkin costume… that’s what I was wearing when I broke my skull. No, it was not Halloween. Yes, I was the only one in costume. It was 1990-something and I was seven. Or maybe I was eight. Hard to remember. Literally.
I’m not sure what led my little mind to put on the costume that day and climb up on the desk. Maybe I was trying to entertain my little brother? Maybe I was acting out because my older siblings wouldn’t let me play Scram Ball? Whatever it was I slipped that pumpkin over my head, climbed up on a desk, and after a slip and four-foot fall I was in the hospital for a week.
Once concussed it is easier to concuss again and so over the years I would find myself in more emergency rooms until eventually I had the hit that led to severe memory loss. With months out of school, cognitive rehabilitation, and a few years of meds I never regained my full memory. What I did gain, however, was worth the trade off. Let me explain.
Those first few months home from the hospital were not easy. My short term memory was so fragile I had to write and track everything. If I didn’t I would forget that I already took my medicine and take it twice. I would forget to eat and go all day with nothing. I would wait for my Physics teacher to come homeschool me, not realizing he already left a few hours before.
I quickly learned not to trust my memory. The assumption from that incident forward was that I would forget. Assuming I would forget meant I needed to develop systems to “remember.”
Flash forward to 20 years later and it is rare that I will forget a task because I don’t give myself a chance to forget. I write it down. It doesn’t matter how small or insignificant, it gets put on a list. If you were in my house you would hear alarms going off on my phone all day long reminding me to change my laundry, go for a walk, or start that meeting.
How do you remember everything ever? You assume you’ll forget everything; you learn not to trust your memory at all and prepare accordingly.
I get asked a lot how I stay so organized. It’s one of the first things people notice about me when they start working with me. When they see everything I do to “prepare accordingly” - Notes, Planner Boards, Check Lists galore - they assume I am naturally like that; that it’s easy for me. The truth is these habits formed out of necessity and in the process my greatest weakness became my greatest strength.
Think of your biggest weakness: what is the thing you struggle the most with right now? I’m trying to go to the gym before work. When you imagine succeeding in that thing, stop imagining the best version of yourself, the one that gets out of bed right when the alarm goes off. Assume that will never happen and plan accordingly.
What can you do to guarantee success? I could move the alarm to the other side of the room. What can you add or take away to nearly guarantee you make it to the gym? I can layout my clothes before I go to bed and ask a friend to meet me there so I have accountability. Our greatest weaknesses don’t become strengths by overcoming them, they become strengths by owning them. You assume that you’ll fail every time; you learn not to trust your best effort and prepare accordingly.
