Find Your Sweet Spot
This is the moment. Right here. I've got a great table near the bar. It's nice and big so I can spread out with my laptop, reference books, and my flight of NEIPAs. I'm almost done with my drinks and I've made great progress on my writing tasks. This is the moment where I can stay, or I can choose to go to the other bar in town. I thought about going there originally, but ended up at this restaurant, one I had already been to a few times. It was familiar. It was easier. It was comfortable.
If I ordered another round, I could stay here in this place where my mind feels protected. Then again, some of the best moments in life emerge from the decision to leave your comfort zone; the instant when you choose - do I stay, or do I go? It is the ultimate Clash of desire; desire to try something new vs desire to remain in what's familiar.
Lately, I've been able to pinpoint that moment for myself which has helped me push through it. You just need to identify it, then you can take steps to control it instead of letting it control you; because it does. That moment of opportunity passes us by before we know what's happening. We find ourselves falling asleep at night playing it over and over in our heads; why did I do that? Why did I say that? I should have gone with her… I should have raised my hand… So many moments that pass us by before we realize what they are.
When I lay it out like that, it sounds deceptively easy. Sometimes it is, but often the difficult part comes when you are trying to figure out when to listen to your discomfort, and when to push through it. On this particular day, I knew I needed to push through it and so I did; I got up, went to the other bar, and I sat at the counter and wrote.
Shortly after I began I found myself in yet another decision moment. I had been there for about an hour and I was not comfortable. This wasn't an emotional discomfort but a physical one. The door was open and I was very cold. I tried to ignore it but I wanted to leave and so I did.
Same day. Two moments. Two different decisions. How do you know when to push and when to listen? The trick is to find the sweet spot, where you’re pushing yourself just enough, because there’s pushing past your comfort zone, then there’s being so uncomfortable you’re frozen. Saying “you gotta' get out of your comfort zone” over simplifies a pretty complicated thing. It makes it easy to think we have to always be pushing ourselves and just putting up with the discomfort because that’s how we grow. But I say find your sweet spot; the spot where you don’t let a little discomfort keep you from a potentially great new experience but you also don’t go so far into discomfort that it’s all you feel.
